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Thai etiquette: the do's and don'ts that matter

Thai people are forgiving with visitors, so don't stress. These are the things that genuinely matter, in plain English.

Greetings and everyday manners

Return a wai: The wai is the palms-together greeting with a small bow. You don't need to start one, but return it when someone gives you one. You don't wai children or staff serving you; a smile and a nod is fine.
Add khrap or kha: Men end sentences with khrap, women with kha. It turns almost anything into a polite sentence, and people notice when you use it.
Keep your cool: Getting loud or angry in public makes everyone lose face, including you, and it rarely gets the result you want. A smile and patience go a lot further.
Don't touch people's heads: The head is the most respected part of the body. Don't pat it, even on a child, and try not to reach over someone's head.
Point with your hand, not your finger: Pointing a finger at people comes across as rude. Use an open hand, or a small nod in their direction.

Don't point your feet at people or Buddha images: Feet are the lowest part of the body. When you sit on the floor, tuck them to the side or behind you rather than stretching them toward someone.
Keep feet off the furniture: Don't put your feet up on tables or chairs, and don't use your foot to move things or point.
Don't step over people or food: If someone is sitting on the floor, or food is laid out on a mat, walk around rather than over.
Shoes off indoors: Take your shoes off before going into someone's home, a temple building and some shops. If there's a pile of shoes by the door, that's your cue.

Cover shoulders and knees: For temples and palaces, wear sleeves and long trousers or a long skirt. The Grand Palace in Bangkok is strict about this; upcountry wats are more relaxed but it's still respectful.
Shoes off for the main buildings: You can usually walk the grounds in shoes, but take them off before entering the ordination hall or any building with a Buddha image.
Treat Buddha images with respect: Don't climb on them, pose disrespectfully with them, or sit with your feet pointing at them.
Women shouldn't touch monks: Monks can't have physical contact with women. If you're a woman handing something to a monk, place it near him, or hand it to a man to pass on.
Be quiet and let people pray: Temples are working places of worship. Keep your voice down and step around people who are praying.

Respect the royal family: Criticizing or mocking the monarchy is a serious crime in Thailand, and that includes damaging money, which carries the King's image. Just don't go there.
Stand for the anthem: The national anthem plays at 8 a.m. and 6 p.m. in many public places, like parks and stations, and the royal anthem plays before films at the cinema. Stop and stand quietly until it finishes.

Share dishes: Thai meals are shared. Take a spoonful at a time from the middle onto your own rice rather than piling up your plate.
Spoon and fork, not knife: Eat with the spoon in your right hand and use the fork to push food onto it. Chopsticks are for noodle soups.
Sticky rice with your right hand: In Isan and the North, roll a small ball of sticky rice with your fingers and use it to scoop food. It's completely normal to eat it by hand.

Go easy on public affection: Holding hands is fine. Kissing and cuddling in public is still frowned on, especially outside tourist areas.
Leave shells and coral where they are: Taking coral or shells from beaches and national parks is illegal, and park rangers do check bags.
Songkran manners: During the water festival in April, don't throw water at monks, babies, the elderly or anyone obviously not playing. Keep your shirt on.

Do I need to wai people in Thailand?

You don't need to start a wai, but return one when it is offered. Don't wai children or service staff; a smile is enough.

What should I wear to a temple in Thailand?

Cover your shoulders and knees: a shirt with sleeves and long trousers or a long skirt. Take your shoes off before entering temple buildings.

Is it rude to point your feet in Thailand?

Yes. Feet are considered the lowest part of the body, so avoid pointing them at people or Buddha images, and keep them off tables and chairs.